There are only a few things that irk me in life – self-righteous, bible-toting, populist conservatives and green-religion, idealist, progressive liberals are two. A third is the topic of this post: liberal assholes with money (LAWM – cizzzoined!).

There are quite a few LAWMs out there. Most of them tend to be leftovers from the dot-coms of the turn of the century that ejaculated an idea into the world and then bailed. Now to be fair, if I had a grandiose dream of a company that skyrockets in value – I’d be the first to sell out. There’s nothing wrong with that. You built your dream, made a mint in the market and now you’re out.

But what I hate most about the LAWM is that most tend to create foundations and promote those foundations for the express purpose of disavowing the same system that made them their fortunes. You see, the LAWM wishes to force you to live by their idealized fantasies because they will generally not be subject to the burdens of their public policy initiatives they love to promote. Like what?

Like healthcare. When any of the LAWMs step up to advocate for public healthcare, they tend to do so from the position of least effect. Yeah – they’ll might pay heftier taxes in the long run. But for the most part, they don’t really have to give a shit about healthcare in the first place because they can already afford to go above and beyond what the public would be subjected to.

At the same time, these douchebags play the “we’re so nice” card while not recognizing the basic problems of the positions they advocate. By creating more bureaucracy and sucking more money out of the private market, it ensures that at least one person out there with a great idea won’t find money to pursue his idea – the same kind of ideas that made the LAWM a ass load of money in the long run.

So if these condescending twits really want to help save the world, maybe they should put their money where their mouths are and just give up all of their money instead of hiding behind a pussified, political foundation hell bent of fucking the rest of us out of our liberties.

Yes, I’m looking at you Pierre Omidyar.